From Self Judgment to Self-Love: Simple Shifts You Can Start Today

Do you catch yourself being your own harshest critic? That constant self-judgment not only drains your energy but keeps you from experiencing joy, success, and self-love. In this solo episode of Worthy and Abundant, I’m sharing some powerful ways to stop judging yourself so you can quiet the inner critic and step into more compassion, confidence, and freedom.

You’ll learn how to:
💡 Recognize when judgment shows up
💡 Reframe negative self-talk into curiosity and learning
💡 Celebrate your wins (big and small!)
💡 Practice simple daily rituals that build self-love
💡 Use EFT tapping to release self-criticism and reset your nervous system

If you’re ready to let go of judgment and step into a kinder, more empowered relationship with yourself, this episode will give you the tools to start today.

👉 And if you’d like to go deeper, I’m offering introductory EFT coaching sessions — 30 minutes for $47 — a beautiful way to release judgment and experience more self-love in just one session. (Link in the show notes to book.)

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Transcript

 Hello, happy Friday. Welcome back to Worthy and Abundant, the podcast with me, Linda Brand, your host. I am a certified life coach, and I wanted to talk to you today about self-judgment and how we all have an inner critic and how to stop self-judgment and multiple different ways we can break this habit.

Yesterday I interviewed. Dr. Jennifer Dahl, who is a holistic A DHD coach. And I have a DHD. And it was a really good conversation. If you didn't listen, you might wanna check it out. You are not broken, you are not flawed. We all think differently and our brains function differently.

So go back and listen to that episode. It's very powerful. Self-awareness is always number one. I want to talk about the habit of self-judgment and how we can practice self-compassion and speak to ourselves with kindness and empathy instead of always criticizing ourselves because it's really just a habit.

So what exactly is self-judgment? When we have low self-esteem, when we have a negative opinion of ourselves, we are prone to judge ourselves and confirm. With our negative beliefs around ourselves. So when we judge ourselves, we are confirming those negative beliefs, that low self-esteem. So we also judge ourselves when we have unrealistic expectations of ourselves, right?

And many of us are prone to perfectionism, demanding perfection from ourselves is another form of self-judgment. And perfectionism was taught in the schools because we were rewarded when things were done a certain way. And the reality is we all learn differently. We all have different skills talents and abilities, and.

Perfectionism is a sign of low self-esteem, it's just a habit that we were taught, and if you have to be perfect, you won't take many actions at all. So. I wanted to talk about, um, exactly what self-judgment is and perfectionism is part of that. Low self-esteem, unrealistic expectations, having the habit to criticize yourself.

So how can we shift this? How can we break the habit of judging ourselves? Number one is to show ourselves compassion. Speak to yourself with kindness and empathy as you would someone you care about. Forgive yourself for making mistakes. Forgive yourself for imperfect. Actions, challenge your negative thoughts.

Where did this come from? Notice them. Notice the critical thoughts in your mind and try to, contradict that negative view, that negative thought, right? And then learning to accept yourself. I am practicing EFT Emotional Freedom Technique, and I'm offering introductory pricing for. EFT emotional freedom technique and it really does work in helping with negative self-talk.

So how can we challenge the negative thoughts we can learn to contradict with proof that this is not true? And then also accepting yourself, learning to appreciate yourself as you are. Setting realistic expectations and not demanding perfection from yourself. Being mindful. Being mindful is like

being conscious, right? When you eat food, tasting the food, when you meditate, noticing your thoughts when you're in nature, seeing the beauty around you, seeing the natural world, that's mindfulness. Paying attention, being present. All we have is this present moment, but so often we're always worrying about the future or living in the past.

So it's about mindfulness, giving yourself love, compassion, and there's so many negative things that come from when you are judging yourself. It fosters inadequacy and self doubt. When you're constantly criticizing yourself, you are starting to believe negative things about yourself.

It leads to anxiety and depression. It, activates your body's stress response. It limits your potential because you're afraid to fail and you're always criticizing yourself so you will avoid opportunities. It strains your relationships because how you talk to yourself is how you talk to others.

And I often say this because I learned this in the last couple years, is that. All self-judgment is, or all judgment, is self-judgment. So when we judge another, we're judging ourselves. When we judge ourselves, we're judging another. It sounds funny, but that's the law of oneness. We're all one. So when you treat someone a certain way, it's really.

How you feel about yourself. So, I try not to take things personally. But we are, like I said, humans. So you want to notice, right? You want to, number one, notice your negative thoughts. Pay attention to the types of situations where you cause yourself to judge yourself and. Challenge that inner critic. Don't accept those negative self thoughts, self-judgment, question them. Look for evidence that contradicts them. Accept yourself for who you are. This is where EFT comes in. It's very powerful. And we tap. We tap on the different meridian points of the head and under the arm and we calm the nervous system. We release energy, energy blocks, and . We acknowledge what's happening and then we release it. So it's very powerful. And also avoid comparing yourself with others. This is humongous, especially with social media. Do not measure yourself worth by comparing yourself to others.

There will always be people who seem like they're doing better, and there's always gonna be. People who are worse off. So focus on your own journey. Celebrate your own progress. Comparing yourself to unrealistic societal standards of perfection or success will only fuel feelings of inadequacy. Avoid criticizing yourself.

Challenge the messages and focus on your strengths and your accomplishment. This is so big. Focus on your strengths and accomplishments. Recognizing your wins, big or small, and celebrate them, helps you build confidence from within. Make a list. Sit down and write out all the things that you've done in your life.

All your skills, talents, achievements. And believe me, I've done this before. I was reading a book and she talked about writing out everything you've done. And it's so powerful and beautiful to see that list 'cause we don't do that. And learn to accept yourself as you are instead of always judging yourself.

Speak to yourself with encouragement and praise. Become your own best friend. I always say become your own best friend. Practice mindfulness. Pay attention to your thoughts, challenge your thoughts. Focus on the present rather than living in the past or worrying about the future, which I just said, focus your mind on the present moment in your immediate surroundings.

Appreciating the simple pleasures like I was writing out today. How can I raise my frequency? Because we live in this energetic universe and everything's vibration. And if we don't. Take actions to. Raise our vibration and notice it like we will default to negative and to lower vibration. So I was writing down a list of everything I can do to feel better and there was so many things that I wrote down.

I was writing down, going to the ocean, walking in nature, meditation, exercise, riding my bike. I was riding out all these different ways. I love chocolate. I love playing with my dog. All these different things that can literally raise your frequency and sparkling water, flowers, there's so many different things.

Anyway, that's off topic. Back to breaking the habit of self-judgment, it requires patience and practice because we want to be gentle with ourselves we have a habit of. Criticizing ourselves, and we've been doing it for years, so you deserve to release this. And that's where EFT can help. And I offer sessions, so reach out to me if you're interested.

It's very affordable. So limit your use of social media because we all know that social media causes us to compare ourselves and everything is perceived. It's not even real. None of it's real. People are only sharing what they want you to see, right? And you can also, , practice mirror work where you look in the mirror and say positive things to yourself.

And, yeah, positive self-talk is very, very powerful. I want you to be gentle with yourself. I want you to be kind to yourself. I want you to take deep breaths. I want you to focus on positivity and loving yourself and accepting yourself and breaking free from. Criticizing yourself and judging yourself.

I want you to speak to yourself with kindness and self-compassion and avoid comparing yourself. Be gentle with your mistakes. Do small acts of self-care each day like a relaxing bath, exercising, pursuing a hobby. You are worthy you are worthy of feeling good, so avoid comparing yourself.

Focus on your own journey. Celebrate your wins. Appreciate who you are, and gratitude always works. I love gratitude appreciate who you are, what you've achieved, the good things in your life, and be grateful for all your lessons. Every perceived to be negative thing. There's, you either win or you learn, you win or you learn.

I always say that. So have a beautiful day everybody. I hope this helped you. I hope this served and supported you and, check out the recent episodes with, the relationship coach Corey and Robin Cohen, the actress who is a beautiful soul and a lot of fun to talk to, and she shares some juicy, juicy stuff.

And then, my recent interview with. The, holistic A DHD coach, and I hope this served and supported you. And if it did, please share with someone. And if you're interested in an EFT session, reach out to me on social media, Linda, brand coach on Instagram, or you can email me linda brand coaching@gmail.com and we will connect soon.

Have a beautiful rest of your day. Happy Friday. Shabbat Shalom. Take care everybody.